Part of being a toddler parent is making peace with the fact that your kid will melt down over the most irrational things. TikToker and highly relatable mom Kristen Cook is already used to this. In a recent video she shared with her 500K followers, she lists the things that have upset her two-year-old in the past week—and we thought we’d heard it all but we were so very wrong.

If you’ve ever seen a toddler toting around an empty bottle of infant Tylenol, a wooden spoon or even a mannequin head, you’ll be familiar with the first item on the list. “I wouldn’t let her bring a jar of pickles with her while we were running errands, like bring it into every store, bring it in the car,” said Kristen. “I told her to leave them at home. That was a no.” Perhaps she needed a snack on the go?

Next Kristen says she “scraped a dry booger off her cheek,” which was obviously akin to sabotage. “I should’ve known she wanted to save that booger. She knew it was there. She put it there,” said Kristen.

Watch the hilarious clip below:

@kristen.cook normal right? #toddler #parenthumor #funnyvideo ♬ original sound – Kristen Cook 💚

Appealing to her toddler’s wishes also apparently didn’t work when Kristen allowed her toddler to stay up a little late to finish her TV show. “She did not like that. She said, ‘No, it’s bedtime,’ and she stomped to her room,” explained a dumbfounded Kristen as she took a short pause and stared off into the distance. At least she follows the rules?

Other items on the list include things like asking the toddler to put on underwear or preventing her from drinking water from the toilet—you know, mean things that moms do.

The next one is hiiiiiighly relatable. “I wouldn’t let her stick her head between my knees so she can watch me pee up close,” says Kristen.

The last item that ticked off the two-year-old is a classic: “I farted.” Was her kid disillusioned? Offended? Jealous? We’ll never know, and luckily the toddler days don’t last forever. Hang in there, Kristen!

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